BHQF

← BACK

The Apostles | 2014


1.

 

So how’ve you been? What’s new? How are things? How is your mother? father? sister? brother? husband? wife? son? daughter? accountant? ex-boyfriend? mistress? lawyer? retirement and actuarial consultant? Good, good. Glad to hear it. Glad to hear it. So you’ve been well? Keeping busy? Oh me? Can’t complain. Can’t complain. Taking it easy. Biding my time. Foaming at the mouth. Working hard playing hard, as they say. And you? And you? How’s business? Did you end up doing that thing? Did you call my guy? Let me give you his number. Just tell him you’re a friend of mine. He’s the best. He’s the best. Been with me for years. Since the beginning. Kill me now. He’s the best. Taking care of business. Keeping up with the joneses. Staring into the emptiness. Experiencing god. Vacationing with the in-laws. Dancing with myself. And you? And you? How’s the house? The car? The noose hanging in your bathroom? Summer plans? Seeing family? friends? Bombing the abortion clinic? It was an excellent service. Excellent. And what a meal! Did you try the fish? The veal? The lamb? The fish? She must have been slaving away in there for many centuries. You really lucked out with that one. A good woman. A good woman. Blessed. Very blessed. Recovering from throat cancer. Thank the lord. Very blessed. You just never know. Every day is a gift. That’s adorable. Absolutely adorable. Very cute. Very cute. I love what you’ve done with the place.

 

2.

 

So what’s new? How’ve you been? How’ve you been? Can’t complain. Can’t complain. How is your mother? Thank the lord. A good woman. A good woman. She must have been slaving away in their for many centuries. Experiencing god. Staring into the emptiness. Very cute. Very cute. I love what you’ve done with the place. You couldn’t ask for a more perfect day. A nicer car. A more personally fulfilling job. Benefits. Vacation days. Time off for good behavior. Summer plans? Seeing family? Friends? Destroying your body with drugs and alcohol? Good. Good. Very good. You couldn’t ask for a more perfect evening. Good food and good company. And your father? Sister? Brother? Good. Very good. How was the circumcision? Excellent. You really lucked out with that one. Every day is a gift. Did you hear? A real tragedy. A real tragedy. Truly tragic. It was a beautiful service. Exactly the way she would have wanted it. And what a meal! Did you try the fish? The veal? The lamb? The fish? Kill me now. Working hard playing hard, as they say. He’s loving it. Loving it. Taking to it like a fish to water. You just never know. Taking it easy. Biding my time. Foaming at the mouth. Adorable. Absolutely adorable.

 

3.

 

And you? And you? Excellent. excellent. Can’t complain. Can’t complain. Working hard playing hard, as they say. Recovering from throat cancer. A real tragedy. A real tragedy. Truly tragic. Did you call my guy? Let me give you his number. Just tell him you’re a friend of mine. Kill me now. How is your mother? father? sister? brother? I love what you’ve done with the place. You’re a true artist. A true friend. A real tragedy. A true retirement and actuarial consultant. And what a meal! Did you try the fish? The veal? The lamb? The fish? He’s the best. Taking care of business. Taking to it like a fish to water. Keeping up with the joneses. Murdering the homeless. You just never know. Every day is a gift. May I refresh your drink? Offer you some cheese? Some meat on a stick? Some advice on how to rear your children? A real tragedy. She must have been slaving away in there for many centuries. Summer plans? Taking it easy. Biding my time. Vacationing with the in-laws. It was an excellent service. Exactly the way she would have wanted it.

 

4.

 

And what a meal! Did you try the fish? The veal? The lamb? The fish? May I refresh your drink? Off you some cheese? Some meat on a stick? A real tragedy. A real tragedy. Truly tragic. Every day is a gift. It was an excellent service. Time off for good behavior. Let me give you his number. Just tell him you’re a friend of mine. How is your mother? father? sister? brother? husband? wife? son? daughter? accountant? ex-boyfriend? mistress? lawyer? retirement and actuarial consultant? He’s the best. He’s the best. Every day is a gift. You couldn’t ask for a more perfect evening. Blessed. Very blessed. Taking to it like a fish to water. Foaming at the mouth. Murdering the homeless. Bombing the abortion clinic. Good. Very good. Like riding a bicycle. Good to be back on my feet. Taking care of business. Keeping up with the joneses. Working hard playing hard, as they say. A real tragedy. Beating her senseless. Who knew? Who knew? Let me give you his number. Exactly the way she would have wanted it. Adorable. Absolutely adorable. And you? And you? Loving it.

 

5.

 

I love what you’ve done with the place. Adorable. Absolutely adorable. You must be so happy. So happy. Beating her senseless. A real tragedy. A real tragedy. Truly tragic. Who knew? Who knew? And your mother? father? sister? brother? Beating her senseless. Good. Very good. A good woman. A good woman. You really lucked out with that one. Can’t complain. Can’t complain. Good food and good company. Like riding a bicycle. Taking it easy. Biding my time. Summer plans? May I refresh your drink? You couldn’t ask for a more perfect day. A nicer car. A more personally fulfilling job. Benefits. Vacation days. You are a true artist. Vacationing with the in-laws. Beating her senseless. Exactly the way she would have wanted it. You are a true artist. Keeping up with the joneses. And what a meal! Did you try the fish? The veal? The lamb? The fish? Excellent. Excellent. A good woman. A good woman.

 

6.

 

And what a meal! A real tragedy. A real tragedy. Truly tragic. You just never know. Every day is a gift. Staring into the emptiness. Experiencing god. Vacationing with the in-laws. Summer plans? Seeing family? friends? The noose hanging in your bathroom? The beach? The mountains? Good. Very good. Every day is a gift. You couldn’t ask for a more perfect evening. May I refresh your drink? Offer you some cheese? Some meat on a stick? A nicer car. A more personally fulfilling job. Benefits. It was an excellent service. Excellent. Very cute. Very cute. Working hard playing hard, as they say. Beating her senseless. He’s the best. He’s the best. Let me give you his number. She must have been slaving away in there for many centuries. Taking to it like a fish to water. Truly tragic. And how is your mother? father? sister? brother? Good. Very good. Every day is a gift. Recovering from throat cancer. Biding my time. Destroying your body with drugs and alcohol? Very cute. Very cute. Taking care of business. Can’t complain. Can’t complain. Mistress? You really lucked out with that one. A good woman. A good woman. Blessed. Very blessed. And you? And you? Just tell him you’re a friend of mine.

 

7.

 

Experiencing god. You just never know. It was an excellent service. Excellent. Exactly the way she would have wanted it. May I refresh your drink? A real tragedy. A real tragedy. Truly tragic. And what a meal! Did you try the fish? The veal? The lamb? The fish? Recovering from throat cancer. Beating her senseless. Murdering the homeless. You couldn’t ask for a more perfect day. How’s the house? The car? Your mother? A good woman. A good woman. A more personally fulfilling job. Adorable. Absolutely adorable. I love what you’ve done with the place. She must have been slaving away in there for many centuries. May I refresh your drink? Offer you some cheese? Some meat on a stick? Like riding a bicycle. Can’t complain. Can’t complain. Every day is a gift. Benefits. Vacation days. Did you call my guy? He’s the best. He’s the best. Let me give you his number. Just tell him you’re a friend of mine. You must be so happy. So happy. Adorable. Absolutely adorable. Kill me now. Exactly the way she would have wanted it. Summer plans? The beach? The mountains?

 

8.

 

May I refresh your drink? Offer you some cheese? Some meat on a stick? A nicer car? Mistress? Mother? Good. Very good. Taking to it like a fish to water. Like riding a bicycle. Recovering from throat cancer. Adorable. Absolutely adorable. Working hard playing hard, as they say. You really lucked out with that one. He’s the best. He’s the best. You must be so happy. So happy. A real tragedy. A real tragedy. Truly tragic. Been with me for years. Summer plans? Seeing family? Staring into the emptiness. A nicer car. Every day is a gift. Thank the lord. And you? And you? How’s business? Did you end up doing that thing? Adorable. Absolutely adorable. I love what you’ve done with the place. Exactly the way she would have wanted it. Keeping up with the joneses. Good food and good company. A more personally fulfilling job. Beating her senseless.

 

9.

 

A real tragedy. A real tragedy. Truly tragic. Every day is a gift. It was an excellent service. Excellent. Let me give you his number. He’s the best. He’s the best. A good woman. A good woman. You really lucked out with that one. Good. Very good. And you? And you? How is your mother? father? sister? brother? husband? wife? You just never know. Every day is a gift. Staring into the emptiness. Cute. Very cute. I love what you’ve done with the place. You couldn’t ask for a more perfect evening. May I refresh your drink? Offer your some cheese? Foaming at the mouth. Can’t complain. Can’t complain. Summer plans? Seeing family? Friends? The beach? The mountains? A real tragedy. A real tragedy. Truly tragic. Just tell him you’re a friend of mine. Good. Very good. Who knew? Who knew? You are a true artist. She must have been slaving away in there for many centuries.

 

10.

 

Can’t complain. Can’t complain. A real tragedy. A real tragedy. Truly tragic. It was an excellent service. Excellent. You couldn’t ask for a more perfect day. Good food and good company. He’s the best. He’s the best. Let me give you his number. A nicer car. A more personally fulfilling job. Benefits. Vacation days. Did you hear? You just never know. Kill me now. You are a true artist. Thank the lord. Blessed. Truly blessed. Every day is a gift. And what a meal! Did you try the fish? The veal? The lamb? The fish? Exactly the way she would have wanted it. Like riding a bicycle. Keeping up with the joneses. Some meat on a stick? You really lucked out with that one. You must be so happy. So happy. Cute. Very cute. Adorable. Absolutely adorable. And how is your mother? father? Good. Very good. You just never know. You just never know.